Saturday, September 8, 2012

Bitter Sweet

My life has been extremely busy over the last week and Its only going to get busier the next 2. Met with my sons school for his IEP,went to his open house and met his new teacher.
He has SPD ADHD and Earlie child hood anxiety. We set up his bus schedule then found out the ride would be over an hour long from our out of town home to Pre-School in town. WAY too long for him to sit on the bus, so now we are going to be driving him to school and picking him up. At least its only 2 days a week so working around it for the surrogacy wont be impossible. Having a child with a disability has its challenges but also has it rewards. He is so loving accepting and has been awesome during the last few months with all that we have asked of him. The long drive to Fargo and back. The countless hours in Fargo and Mommy's tiredness with all the medications. My son is AMAZING!! My family has been wonderful through all of this. Its not just me doing this its them too.
 I'm so blessed to have such a strong compassionate husband and loving children.     
Proud Mama here * big smiles*

Today was Alexandria's 3rd annual CHD awareness walk. I volunteer to Lasting Imprint. A non profit organization that my girl friend started in memory and honor of her little girl that passed away from a CHD. She was only 14 days old.
Today we had a great turn out.
 Not sure on the numbers exactly but I'm guessing close to 300 people came out for the 2 mile walk/run. 
Nick and the kiddos walked and I stayed behind at one of the many stations we had.
The kids where troopers..
Part of the booth I helped run.
Some of the people at the beginning of the walk.

My Goof ball of a husband. His Cousins Daughter has a Heart defect. He walks for Team Riese
The super awesome fire truck this year. BIG HIT!

As I posted in an earlier post I had an interview with the local paper.
Well she wanted some pictures of us and the journey as well as a family picture. After realizing I didn't have much of family pictures we decided to go get a few done with a friend of mine that owns her own business.
CS Photography..
 Her husband is friends with Nick so we had alittle play date as well.
The kids had a blast and we got great pictures for the paper.

( here is her web site)
The last month has had its up and downs and has now left me feeling like a piece of me is missing. Not exactly from the miscarriage its self but everything else that went with it.
Some people have recently asked if the babies took and whats all going on.
 ( thank you for thinking of me.)
Explaining that we lost them at about 4 weeks but we will be trying again in October.
 I'm sure people arnt sure how to respond and bless them they are so sweet and gentle with their words. It has been difficult knowing that for what ever reason it didn't work but at the same time having that strength of not giving up and going to do it again not really "makes it ok" but pushes me on to know that God has a bigger plan and I am OKAY. Ive Accepted Gods plan thus far and working towards the next steps. Some have responded like it was my own children and to that part makes me feel awkward. Yes it "hurt" and was mentally difficult but way different then when I had my chemical a year ago.

Still pressing on and October cant come soon enough.
I'm hoping and praying for good weather for the appointments and transfer.



1 comment:

  1. You have the biggest heart Amanda! Love you!

    Awesome family picture :)