Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Cramping/Back Pain

Well Last night I had pain that took me to my knees. Called the Dr oncall and he told me to take some IBP and to call in the morning if its still continuing. Well it was still hurting but not as bad with the help of pain meds, So this morning I had to go to Fargo for blood work and an ultrasound. Turns out I have a nasty badder infection. I was hoping to go back to work this weekend but it looks like that wont be happening at least until after Monday. Ive taken 2 doses of my antibiotics and I'm hoping by morning It will start being more tolerable.Ive never had one before so I wouldnt of even guessed that was the issue last night.

Water weight with the meds dont help. Lugging extra weight around I can feel it in my feet. So after the kids go to bed Im taking a nice hot bath and putting my feet up to a movie. =D

I got to see Sam today. Its always fun seeing her. We have ALOT in common... to the point its a little creepy in a good way haha.


Monday, July 30, 2012

Going on Day 5

Going on day 5 tomorrow morning since the transfer and Ive already gained 10lbs. I guess I heard some bloating is normal but I wanst expecting this. In less then 5 days 10 LBS. Lets face it, Im not a TINY person and Im AOK with that. But holy crap! Ya Ill be honest this parts hard. I mean if we get a BFP then weight gain doesn't bother me one bit. I gained 20 with Thomas and 10 with Olivia and lost it all and plus some the first month or so afther they where born. I did some reading and most women who have done IVF gain some weight. anywhere from 4 to 10 lbs and each cycle expect to gain extra weight from the medications. I really hope this works the first time. I never minded pregnancy weight gain hormones acne whatever!!! Its all apart of it and I expected it. I'm just a bit shocked right now at how fast it all came...


Ive been having alot of cramping and back pain. The Dr said that this is normal and GOOD and to take IBP. oofta.

Come on Babies stick for Manda <3 <3 <3

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Today is the Day!

I woke up really earlie this morning.. Like 6am!
I had a dream I forgot to take my shower with all my scent free products and we couldn't do the transfer. I woke up in a panic. Finally fell back to sleep for an hour and got ready for the transfer.

When I got there Sam was waiting for  me. Nick and the kids left to the local park and we met with the nurse to go over what all's going to happen and what I can and cant do the next 2 days.
Dr Christiansen came in and Sam signed all the papers for the transfer. I took the Valium they prescribed me to take to relax my uterus and we went back....



Here is the stuff they used for the transfer and to prep me for the transfer


Scent free, makeup free, sporting my shoot for sam shirt WAITING


Ultrasound to make sure my bladders full enough for the transfer


Amanda D (Check)
Birth Date (Check)
2 embryos (Check)...


They have a camera in the lab that shows parents there embys before they bring them out for the transfer..



Ultrasound during the transfer so they are placed in the perfect spot =)


Here are the 2 precious little ones

We picked up a bite for lunch and came home. I slept most of the way. I dont feel any pain or discomfort really. Just tired.

Little sore but thats to be expected.

Thank you everyone for the thoughts and prayers. We are so blessed and thankful to have such supportive family and friends during this wonderful times in our lives.


Sam and I after the transfer. She has her hand on her babies... so beautiful!

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Transfer

Tomorrow we transfer 2 little buns into my oven.

They harvested 20 eggs from Sam and 14 survived fertilization. They will freeze 12 in case these 2 dont stick OR want more in the future!!!

Im so excited. Not so much for the transfer its self but for the happiness its bringing Sam and Jack and them being there tomorrow.

Everythings scent free and ready to go!!!

Lots of sticky dust please <3

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

SICK SICK SICK

I feel just awful this morning. Im tired bloated crampy and I feel like throwing up. I knew this wouldnt be easy as pie and up until now I really didnt feel that crummy. Just 2 more days until the transfer. I will still be on meds for a few weeks after but the transfer for me marks a large mile stone of it all.

They haven't contacted me on a time yet but they where guessing Earlie afternoon sometime.

Nicks working a 12 hr shift today and wont be home until after dinner. Hes been wonderful!! Doing stuff around the house, giving me lots of back rubs and taking off work for some of the appointments. Its so true one must have a good support system with being a gestational surrogate. Thanks Babe...

Monday, July 23, 2012

3 Days

Well we headed off to Fargo again this morning. This time Jackie came with me. She sat with the kids while I went in and saw the Dr, then we went to the park and Mall for some lunch a shopping.


mmmm The largest Dough Nut !!



Appointment~ I was at 8.4 last week and since they added in the other medication I jumped back up to 10!!! YEY perfect for a transfer. So this morning I started the Endometrin as well as the pills to stop ovulation and an antibiotic. As well as continue the patches and other medication. All these medications make me feel bloated crampy and nauseated. It will be nice when I can be off everything and just be pregnant =)


Sam had her retrieval and I am excited to announce that she has way more then we where originally looking at.. (2). We have 20!!!!

Now hopefully we have a good bunch that survive the fertilization and freezing for a later date (hopefully not needed unless Sam wants more then what we get with this one fresh cycle).

She is at home resting. Pop over to her blog to see her post today.

We go back on Thursday for the TRANSFER! Then 10 days later we see if their bun is growing in my oven.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Not as planned

Well things arnt going as planned. Sams follicles arnt maturing like expected and she has to be on meds a bit longer. Trigger Shot on Saturday and the harvesting on monday. Then the transfer will be Thursday sometime.

Well they called me this morning and from my last appointment to the one before it my lining has dropped from 10 something to 8.4
She said this usually doesn't happen and I need to come back in Monday to make sure its getting thicker.
Yep, pretty stressed right now.
Nick works mornings so now I have to either call my daycare lady and hope she has openings..
 (more money)
Hope my appointment is before Sams and she is able to sit with the kids. or my GF Jackie comes with me if shes in town and sits with the kids.
Talk about stressful.
Sam had her stressful day yesterday with having to wait longer running around town looking for her meds no one had. Thankfully the clinic had an emergency supply on hand.

Now I'm taking a vag. pill to thicken my lining with the patches.

Starting Monday I start the meds to shut off my ovaries an antibiotic due to it weakening my immune system and another vag. insert of hormones.

I keep preying this works the first time.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

To Sam and Jack

Our friendship started differently,
 Than most friendships I've had.
 We had to search each other out,
 because of pain we both had.

A precious little bundle to fill your arms,
 Is what you were looking for.
 Your broken tummy took that away
A broken tummy that you had no say.

And so a search began for you,
 to find a helping heart.
 So similar to my own search,
 not knowing where to start.

For me, the search is special,
 See I too know that pain
 I was told of PCOS
 And the child that would never be
 A child that came 2 years later
And another that’s now 3

I wanted a couple to have a child for...
 the one with a broken tummy.
 The one I searched for

Now we've found each other,
 so real it seems to be.
 Through faith and hope and honesty,
 we're moving toward your dream.

But the dream we have,
 it is the same, a dream that's filled with firsts.
 First smiles, first laughs, first steps, first words.
 All starting with a birth.

Since I know this pain that you bare inside even.
 though I can't imagine, all that you've been through,
 I hope you know I'll do my best to bring a child to you.

Surrogacy is something not many can do.
 But I've been there and here I am,
 I'm drawn to helping you.

Some people call us Blessings,
angles in disguise.
 Im no angle Im just me
 I feel all normal inside.

Even tho our journey is just starting,
 and no one knows our end.
 I pray it brings to you a child,
 and brings to me a friend.
 I promise to never leave you,
 Don’t ever be afraid.
 Im here no matter how long this takes

Love,
Amanda Dahmes

Friday, July 13, 2012

OUCH

Went back to Fargo today for my saline sonogram to look for polyps and where to place the 2 embys. Everything went great! Blood work showed good numbers and my lining looks GREAT!

It did hurt tho =S
Sam was there and was amazing! At first when I was laying there she was all can I rub your head all jokingly like mommy like and giggling with the Dr and I, then all of a sudden they filled my uterus with the solution and let me tell you WAS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING! It was like a severe crap or a medium size contraction.

 Sam was right there. Once giggling into serious mommy face. Holding my arm and rubbing my head. As weird as it sounds I had a picture of what it would be like in delivery. Things I once thought about in wonder..

What would she be like??
What would I be like???
Would I accept it like with Nick??

All I can say was that it was 100% natural. Comforting.. Perfect.

Some people have asked me " Don't you feel like a rent a womb'?

In a way before today I did in a small way. I mean we have an amazing relationship. I feel like Ive known her for years. We talk about stuff I only talk about with  my Bestest of friends.Today
there was love and compassion above and beyond any contract. The way everything happened wouldn't of happened with a "rent a womb" I believe.  So to clear that question up "NO"!

Granted delivery is alot worse then just a saline sonogram but its the start. Start of a long road we will be traveling together that before today was all about the "when" it happens... its now the "ITS HAPPENING"!


The dr told us we are looking at this coming FRIDAY or MONDAY!!! 1 WEEK!!!!

Olivia told me today that she is going to feed sams baby french frys..

Cute

Sam goes in tomorrow for an ultrasound and from there we will find out the exact date for retrieval then 3 to 5 days after that will be the transfer.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Patches

I started my patches last Friday. I feel bloated having anxious spells and sore breasts. Other then that its been pretty good.

I go back to Fargo Friday for another US and testing. They are going to look for the perfect spot for the two precious embys.

The kids are going to daycare this time. Last trip we made Thomas kept asking to go home and was upset to be going again. All this driving the last 2 months have really been hard on the kids. Not so much in the beginning but weeks into it. They defiantly need a break from the car. I'm so proud of my 2. They have been so great with this big adjustment with traveling. Something they are not used to.

Olivia thinks the babies are in my tummy already and moved to my breasts.. So I have 2 baby's for boobies if that makes sense haha. The stuff kids come up with!

Friday, July 6, 2012

Happy Day

AF started last night after I got off the phone with the clinic. YEY
So I called them this morning and told them. They wanted to see me today for Blood work and a ultrasound. Everything looked great and I started my patches today. (2 patches on and replaced with 2 new every other day)
Then next Friday I go back to Fargo for another Ultrasound, blood work, and a saline Ultrasound to know where to place their 2 precious little embys.
We will also be starting more medications and continue the patches (I believe but will have to double check with the patches)
 Our transfer date got bumped back a few days so it will be the last week of the month as of now. Not sure on the day.

After my appointment we went to Mc Donald's with Sam and then hung out at her house for a hour while the kids played with her 4 dogs. The kids LOVED IT!

I'm so excited that this month is going to work for the transfer!!!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Its a new day

http://www.drugs.com/sfx/provera-side-effects.html

Theres the wonderful list of side effects from the medication I'm taking. Provera.

Bloating, peeing more, breast tenderness,  galactorrhea , feelings of sadness/anxiety, restless/cant sleep, weight loss, some hair loss, Breaking out (GERR), cramping.

For a few days in the beginning I kept telling Nick that I felt something was wrong. I felt out of sorts and then I noticed the galactorrhea. So I googles the side effects and it all fell into place. I guess I never thought of side effects since I didn't really have many taking medication to get pregnant with Thomas. But that was femara and this is provera. kinda the same. Does the same in the long run but wow the side effects are so much different.

I'm still waiting for AF. At this point I'm over the freaking out it needs to come, its more like letting go and letting God. Obviously I'm worried about being ready for the transfer but as far as my AF is concerned if it doesn't happen this month then God must not want it to. We can transfer next month if this cycle doesn't line up.

Not saying it doesnt suck but I cant worry about what I cant control.

On a happy Note it was my 25th Birthday yesterday. That's right I am a 4th of July baby!!! I love my birthday. Fireworks, food , family/friends,lake, bon fires whats not to love!
I had a good day with family and friends. Some left Earlie and that sucked but in all it was really good. Kids played in the swimming pool all day. We gave them their bath before we left to go watch the fire works and they passed out before we even made it out of town. Slept through the whole thing and all the way home. We put them to bed and that was that. I recorded the show on my phone so they could watch it today.

Ive noticed over the last 2 months my friends list is getting smaller and smaller (probably 10 plus friends). Some Ive done myself and and the rest people have deleted me. At first I was upset that some of these people felt that for what ever reason they didn't want to be friends and then I thought well ... I gotta except it. I'm not sure if it because of this surrogacy or the fact I speak my mind and post debatable articles on FB. All I know is that from what I can tell its about the time I came out with our news of matching. I need people in my life that support me and is there for me., Those who have deleted me must not care and Ive accepted that. Ive realized that time changes people. Some grow and become better more mature adults and others live in this little bubble of a life and don't want to move and grow up. its a hard fact of life I guess when you see that with people YOU care about. but you cant control anyone but yourself or help those who don't want to help themselves. I'm not saying it still doesn't hurt from the people I truely deeply cared about but its about acceptance.

The worst feeling I think is when you realize you care more about someone then they ever cared about you. The choices people make in life that you thought would include you and it doesn't ... cuts deep.

Today is a new day and I'm so thankful for the people in my life that are there and care. I have such a big heart and usually it gets broken. Ive been told I love to love.. and I guess its true. I try and love everyone for who they are and stand up for that. If thats wrong thats ok by me.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Its a Birthday

My son had his birthday party on sunday (hes 4)
And Sam came to party with us. I was afraid she would think my house/ family/ and friends where all overwhelming and hyper haha but she didnt think anything strange about it. haha! She said it was like her moms side of the family.
She got to meet my husband and my grandparents. Nicks parents my aunt sister and friends.
I was so happy she was here. We dug out all of my meds, sprawled them out on my bed and went through them all. it was nice sitting and talking about our next steps. My daughter adores Sam. Its sooo cute! Thomas thinks shes pretty "cool mom". Hes more active so pictures are hard to come by haha..

Thomas and his Friends

Hunter and Thomas... so cute

Olivia hanging out with her Great Grandparents and Auntie

Sam and Olivia

 Sam and I... Perfect!